It can be fun when it’s you flying solo, but not when it’s your kid. Your heart suffers more turbulence than a plane caught in a Kansas tornado. But divorced moms must face the reality of sending their kids off alone on a plane for a scheduled visit with Dad.

However, don’t labor over it — even on Labor Day weekend. There are several procedures you can follow that are as essential as safety belts and more healthy than popping Valium:

• With the increase of divorced kids flying alone, airlines now make provisions for them. The kids are called UM’s – as in unaccompanied minor. Instead of making their airline reservation via internet, you should call the airlines, since they require information on who will deliver the child and who will pick the child up at the destination.

• The person who delivers the child to the plane and the person who picks the child up must both have photo IDs and cell phones.

• The parent will be given a pass to accompany the child to the departure gate and must stay until the flight takes off. Kids age 5 to 7 can fly nonstop only.

• UM’s require an extra payment – usually around $25 – and this will include the cost of the airline staff watching over them on the flight and ushering them to meet the other parent at arrival gate. If there are two kids flying solo, it will be only one fee.

• Prepare your child by calling it an adventure and spell out all the procedures so that he or she will know what to expect.

• Don’t rely on Jetblue’s TV screens to occupy them the whole time. Just in case, send them off with coloring books, cards, and a few games.

• Pack an extra snack because, just like you, they may sneer at airline food – if they are offered any. Hungry kids are cranky kids. You don’t want passengers to howl in protest.

According to news reports this week, Britney Spears is planning to contest some of her divorce attorney’s legal fees, arguing that they are too high.

Whether you’re Britney Spears or Brittany Smith, divorce can be a costly venture – and being overcharged by a divorce attorney can be a real issue.

According to FWW’s Diana Mercer, a California attorney who specializes in mediation and is the author of “Your Divorce Advisor,” when clients feel they’ve been overcharged, the first step is to ask for an itemized billing and compare it against your own notes of phone calls, court dates, letters, and work you know the lawyer did.

“Your best action is to do this all along during the case,” she says. “Most attorneys bill you each month (and if they don’t, ask them to) so review your bill carefully each month and bring it to the attorney’s attention if you think you’re not getting good value for your money.”

Attorney Gregg Herman, the family chair of the American Bar Association, says that the client should also reflect on the conversations they have had with the lawyer.

“Good professional lawyers always assess the cost/benefit ratio to a client in recommending a particular course of action,” he says. “Ask to meet with your lawyer to discuss your concerns. Perhaps the lawyer can explain the bill to your satisfaction — or make an adjustment so that you are both comfortable with it.”

If talking with the attorney doesn’t give you the result you’d hoped for, you can ask the local bar association about its fee dispute mediation program.

The opening lines of Leslie Lehr’s novel “Wife Goes On” will resonate with many women.

“The truth is, I was afraid to be alone” she writes, tapping into most women’s secret fear. “Then I heard my daughter swear she’d never get married and I realized sticking it out wouldn’t win me Mother of the Year.

“If I wanted my kids to be happy, I would have to show them how. So I tore off those golden shackles — and found out I wasn’t alone. … Everywhere, there are members who have paid their dues, know the secret handshake and are reaping the benefits of real friendship. Welcome to Club Divorce.”

That’s Diane, an MBA hotshot turned PTA Superman, speaking. In Lehr’s frothy romp, the bond of friendship between Diane and three other women creates opportunities for hankies for the tears, a hankering for new careers, and hanky-panky in dating.

Diane’s husband gambled away their assets, proving that even if your hubby is in the insurance business, there is no assurance that marriages last forever. She uses her business moxie to start Pure Romance, a company selling sex toys based on the Tupperware models of your mom’s generation.

Then there is Lana, a luscious former actress who works in a furniture store, and isn’t going to sit around and feel sorry for herself.

Annette is the hard-edged divorce lawyer who has to pay alimony to her ex-husband, who left her for a man and got custody of their daughter. She wants her child back, on her terms.

Finally there is the homecoming queen, Bonnie, who married the football star and finds that her life — saddled with two kids and Buck, a beer-swilling husband — is no fairytale.

Lehr’s characters experience all the dramas and traumas of divorce — dealing with lawyers, pissed-off kids, budgets shrunken to the size of a brownie, relocation, rejection, and, most importantly, rejuvenation.

Life isn’t over after a divorce. It’s a new beginning. But women are worried about dating again, about their ex-husbands dating again, and about the shaky feeling that comes when the divorce process begins.

www.truemomconfessions.com has agreed to swap content with firstwivesworld.com every week. True Mom Confessions provides the questions, and we provide the advice.

True Mom Question:

I don't know the protocol on dating after divorce. I haven't had feelings for soon-to-be ex DH in a long time, so I feel like I'm ready to embark on the dating scene. Do I wait until the divorce is final (at least four more months)? How long before I introduce him to the kids? I am really scared about this situation. Will anybody want to date a single Mom?

First Wives World Answer:

Single moms date all the time, and find love again. It’s called reinvention and renewal and possibility. It all awaits you in the next chapter of your life. Look at Reese Witherspoon, even Angelina Jolie. They were single moms. Now you may think, “I’m not a movie star.” But you are. You have within you something that shines brightly and will be desirable to the right person. Since your divorce is going to be finalized in four months, however, why not wait? Use this time to embark on improving yourself, buying a new outfit for a first date, and becoming the best person you can be. As far as when to introduce someone to the kids, let’s wait until you find someone worthy. While there are no set rules, most experts say you shouldn’t introduce kids to anyone you haven’t dated for at least six months. You want them to have faith in the sturdiness and consistency of love. Life is long. A whole new future awaits you, and your children.

TMQ:

What does a divorced girl need besides a good attorney, a loyal girlfriend and gainful employment? A good laugh.

“Still Hot: The Uncensored Guide to Divorce, Dating, Sex, Spite, and Happily Ever After” by Sue Mittenthal and Linda Reing delivers.

It’s a bubbling summer cobbler about the trials and tribulations of women whose middle-aged husbands leave them for the office cupcakes, dishy Russian bimbos, or hot Tarot card readers.

Sue Mittenthal and Linda Reing met when their children were toddlers and reconnected when their husbands toddled off. Only after they had moved on from their divorces could they look back and see the unexpected comedy in the drama; they decided to share it in this book, along with observations of divorced friends they met along the way.

Here are some observations:

Tell-Tale Signs He’s Leaving

• You see him gazing into the rearview mirrors while pulling up the skin around his eyes.
• Lately he volunteers to stir-fry tofu and bok choy.
• You find men’s moisturizer in the medicine cabinet, next to his Crest whitening strips and his Just For Men hair dye kit.
• He starts futzing with his comb-over and you catch him clicking on classmates.com.

Just Because He Wants a “Do-Over” It’s Not Your Fault

“That’s revisionism. You are no more responsible for his wretched state that you are for his receding hairline. His about-face is a direct result of his fear of death and decrepitude.”

Girlfriends and “Frenemies”

A girlfriend hears about your divorce and “whisks you off to Linens ’n’ Things” for fresh bedding or shepherds you to Victoria’s Secret”; she also doesn’t laugh while you “try on the rhinestone-studded g-string.”

Recently, truemomconfessions.com shared some of their members’ concerns with firstwivesworld.com, and we agreed to swap content every week. They will provide the confessions, and we will provide the advice.

Here are this week’s confessions.

True Mom Confession:

"I have never been away from my kids before. It’s been one week and I have two more to go. This part of divorce sucks! I miss them so much. I don't think I can make it another two weeks."

FWW response:

Not seeing your kids every day is one of the hardest parts of divorce. Your heart feels split because you and your husband have split. Many women, however, use this time as an opportunity. It’s guilt-free time for you. Yes, you. Visit friends if you need to get out of the house. Luxuriate in a romantic bath. Nestle into bed with lots of magazines. Consider all the things that you don’t do that you now can. Think about your life and hobbies or projects or jobs you want to do. In a way, divorce prepares you to be an empty-nester — except the little ones will come back and you will appreciate them more when they do.

True Mom Confession:

"Part of me wants to move overseas and leave my kid with relatives. I never expected to be a divorced mother, and am not doing very well by myself. My parents both abandoned me as a child, and I survived.... But I can't imagine doing that to another human being. His father already left him, so I can't leave him too."

FWW Response:

Newsflash, divorced moms: You will not be replaced by the stepmother. Most children have a primal connection to their mother that is almost impossible to break.

Recently, truemomconfessions.com shared some of their members’ concerns with firstwivesworld.com, and we agreed to swap content every week. They will provide the confessions, and we will provide the advice.

Here is what they ask.

True Mom Confession:

"My kids are about to get a new step mom. And I am conflicted. I feel overwhelming gratitude for this woman who seems to genuinely like, maybe even love, my kids... but I fear that I am being ‘replaced’."

FWW Response:

The heart is elastic. There is plenty of love to go around and your children will love you more for allowing them to enjoy their father and stepmother without guilt. Too many parents have the impulse to spoil the kids to compete with the new stepmom, when in fact simple pleasures and values endure far more than any doll, dress, or X-Box.

Have faith in your primal advantage and your fabulousness.

True Mom Confession:

"I think I’m too selfish to be a step mom."

FWW Response:

That’s refreshing honesty. And, turns out, it’s lucky for you.

Stepmoms often twist themselves like pretzels to accommodate children who only want to spend time with their dads, whom they see much less because of the divorce.

You don't have to spend all your time with them, but women are often the social directors of a house. So look up events, talks, and walks in your town, and create fun things for Dad and the kids to do. Then leave them to it and have a manicure or read a book.