From Julie Savard: I'm recently divorced and I have two children. Money is very tight; I'm trying to make ends meet and build a better life for us, but it's hard right now. That's okay; things will get better. But I want to continue having a "normal" life for my kids. What's the best way to spend a little on them without breaking my budget and allow them their usual activities or treats? I feel like I'm spending when I need to save, but I don't want my kids to feel like we have to scrimp!

Craig Hyldahl writes:

Hi Julie,

Having to lower one's normal spending post-divorce is tough enough for an adult; reducing spending on the kids is even more difficult — they don't understand why they can't do their normal activities, and you struggle with guilt and frustration.

How do you stretch limited funds?

Not to worry! Several of our clients have come up with ingenious ideas that were very inexpensive that their kids loved; here are a few (along with one of my own):

Trips to Washington DC: I don't know where you live, but visiting our nation's capital can be incredibly exciting and many of the museums are free. Click here for more.

Shore/Lake Day Trips: pack a lunch and off you go!

Baseball Games: I know a mom who could no longer afford to take her kids to professional baseball games. Instead of giving up on the idea, she found a local minor league team where tickets are very inexpensive and "the between innings contests" are a highlight for her boys.

Local library/Town Hall: Look at the postings and newsletters for free/discounted events.

Hiking Trip: My business partner swears by this-lots of sightseeing and picture taking to a local preserve.

If you're like most parents, you tend to give your kids the same type of advice your parents gave you: "Go to school and get good grades so you can get into a good college and get a good job with a good company that offers good benefits." While this advice is well meaning, in most cases it is not applicable for our children entering the workforce today.

Does this scenario sound familiar? After graduating from college, young people get good jobs and the money starts flowing; the avalanche of credit card offers arrive, and with it comes increased spending. Once married, "double income, no kids" becomes the norm, accompanied by ever-increasing spending. Now comes the house and kids, followed by pressure to buy an even bigger house and car to keep pace with their peers. Add the additional expense of college savings and fancy vacations and, well, you get the picture.

It's like running faster and faster on a treadmill; you work harder and harder, yet are getting nowhere. For the rest of their working lives, this once happy couple is trapped; they have learned nothing about money, and are forced to work like mad to make ends meet.

This insanity must stop!

The only effective way to stop this generational attitude toward money is to reeducate our children in how they think about and handle money. One of the biggest reasons why our children are facing these spiraling money woes is their demand for instant gratification. "I will put this on my credit card so I can go on vacation now." "I will take a loan on my 401k to have a new BMW now."

We have to teach our children at an early age not to succumb to the pressure of our culture's spending habits.

In general, state law determines child support guidelines. After the gross income of both parents is totaled, certain deductions are allowed from each parent's income, (such as local income taxes already paid and child support paid to other children). Keep in mind that any court-ordered spousal support is included in the gross income of the recipient spouse, and is deductible from the gross income of the payor spouse.

Once the adjusted gross income of each parent has been totaled, these figures are applied to a chart which outlines the approximate support required to raise a child based on stated income levels. The court then requires each parent to pay his/her pro rata share of that charted amount.

For example, if the mother is earning $90,000 and the father is earning $60,000, the combined total is $150,000. If the charted amount states that $10,000 of child support is required each year, the father would be required to pay $4,000 of the $10,000 because he provides 40% of combined spousal income. Furthermore, the mother would be required to pay $6,000 because she contributes 60% of combined spousal income.

Once these payments are determined, the amounts can be changed; however, you will need to go through a similar process, just as when child support was first established. The parent requesting the change must file papers with the Court and prove that there are significant changes, beyond his/her control, which necessitate a change in the current arrangement.

Child support payments continue until the youngest child graduates high school or reaches age 18. Unless otherwise ordered, payments to a child over the age of 18 will continue to age 19 as long as the child attends high school. Special consideration is made to disabled children and children born out of wedlock.