Warning: If you are arguing over who gets the "Endless Love" CD or a hairbrush, you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse are spiraling out of control. Yes, your "stuff" may have great sentimental value. And yes, telling your soon to be ex-spouse that you want something that you know he or she will want—just to annoy them—may give you some sense of satisfaction at the time. But you have to stop and regroup.

It is very important that you take a practical approach when dividing up your marital "stuff" (or as we lawyers like to call it, "personal property"). It makes no sense to spend more money on attorney's fees or appraisal fees than your "stuff" is worth.

The most effective approach is for you and your soon to be ex-spouse to make a list of what you want to take with you after the divorce. Exchange your lists and negotiate the items you both want. In this day and age of technology, this is no reason to fight over photos anymore...just make copies. And when it comes down to the fishing pole, just give it to him. You can even flip a coin for the unresolved items, especially if these items do not have substantial value.

If you have personal property of great value and you cannot agree on the value and how to divide the items, you will have to get them appraised. You will incur appraisal fees and probably counsel fees in order to resolve the issue.

In most jurisdictions, if you brought personal property into the marriage, these personal items will be considered separate property and not subject to division. If you purchased items during your marriage, these items will be considered marital property, and are subject to division.
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For many married couples, the home is the most valuable asset in their marriage, both emotionally and financially.  As a result, what happens to the home can easily become a point of dispute in a divorce. 

The family home (what legal experts term the "marital home") is an asset that is subject to distribution.  The percentage of equity that you are entitled to will depend upon the laws in your particular state.  Nevertheless, it is important that you have realistic expectations when addressing this issue. With the slowing housing market, rising interest rates, and lenders tightening the reins on their mortgage qualification requirements, it becomes even more challenging for divorcing couples to divide the marital home. 

Selling The Marital Home

It's crucial to consider that, in the current housing market, your home may take many months to sell.  This means that you could be divorced before your home is sold.  If you and your spouse cannot afford to live apart prior to receiving your share of the sale proceeds, you may be forced to live together for some period of time, after the divorce, until the house is sold.  It may be impossible for you to imagine living with your spouse after you're divorced, but it's a realistic expectation that you must consider.

Keeping The Marital Home 

While some people would like to keep the marital home after the divorce, this may not be a realistic expectation.  If you want to keep the marital home, you have to "buy out" your spouse's interest in the home.  If you're fortunate enough to have significant assets in your marital estate, you may be able to offset your spouse's interest in the marital home with your interest in another asset of equal value. 

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