There's been a lot of buzz on the blog in regards to songs and song lyrics that remind us of our exes or of our divorces. It reminded me of how I felt immediately after Levi left and the songs that I listened to.

What is it about the human condition that makes us sort of torture ourselves with stuff like this after a breakup anyway? My divorce process had a soundtrack. For real. I made myself a CD and I listened to it all the time. Sometimes singing along, sometimes crying, but most of the time, pining away.

My divorce soundtrack — along with the particular lyrics that would absolutely slay me — went something like this:

U2, One Love:
"Did I ask too much
More than a lot
You gave me nothing
Now it's all I got"

Johnny Cash (previously done by Nine Inch Nails), Hurt:
"What have I become
my sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt"

Dave Matthews Band, Stay or Leave:
"Wake up naked, drinking coffee, making plans to change the world
while the world is changing us.
It was good, good love.
And you used to laugh under the covers,
maybe not so often now
The way I used to laugh with you was loud and hard"

The Felice Brothers, Wonderful Life:
"Me and you have done the same damn thing
We fell in love knowing the pain it would bring
Now all I do is sing
Sad songs with red underneath"

Ani Difranco (every girl going through a divorce needs Ani), Done Wrong:
"like how could you do nothing
and say, i'm doing my best
how could you take almost everything
and then come back for the rest
how could you beg me to stay
reach out your hands and plead
and then pack up your eyes and run away
as soon as I agreed"

James, Laid:
"My therapist said not to see you no more
She said you're like a disease without any cure
She said I'm so obsessed that I'm becoming a bore, oh no
Ah, you think you're so pretty"

And trust me, this is just a choice few; there were several (hundred) more. I'm sure it's normal for us to torture ourselves with a song or two, but did anyone else have an entire CD?