How Did You Handle Your Divorce?

I had dinner a few nights ago with my aunt who lives in the city. She’s 40 and went through a messy divorce a few years ago. She and I had briefly discussed our divorces with each other before, but it was always with other family members around, so our stories were always censored.

It was really fascinating to compare war stories and hear someone else’s perspective about meeting men post-divorce. She had basically done most of the same things I did when Steve first left. She taught me an interesting lesson. No matter what age they are, men are still the same. They’ll say things they think you want to hear and they’ll play the same stupid games. It doesn’t matter if they’re 25, 30, 35 or 40. I guess no matter what age you are, the first few months after divorce are definitely interesting times.

I obviously can’t speak for other people, but she and I basically handled our divorces the same way. We went out, we met guys, and we believed them when they told us we were beautiful. I fell for ridiculous lines. Or maybe I knew they were lines, but justified what I was doing by pretending I believed them, and I used my social life as a way to not think about what I was going through. It definitely worked for me, though.

Looking back, I think I was sleepwalking for the first three months after my separation because everything from that time seems like a blur. I only vaguely remember most of the details, but I am thankful for all of those moments. At the time, they made me feel alive when everything else was falling apart.