I've always completed the taxes for our family. It's usually a very simple project. With the proper organization and a few hours on Turbo Tax, our forms are completed, submitted, and awaiting the approval of the IRS. And, to top it off, we generally get a refund.

This year is different. My ex wants to claim the taxes as married filing jointly to get a bigger refund, however he's being a total pain in the ass about it.

Normally, I would have had the taxes finished and had the refund check already deposited into the accounts and possibly even already decided upon how to "position" the funds — whether that meant paying off bills or sticking the money into savings for a rainy day.

So, I'm trying to be patient and wait for something to be done. I refuse to pay someone to do the taxes, when I bloody well know how to download the program and get it all done efficiently for less.

I'm so not looking forward to the additional financial challenges this year will bring. I mentioned previously that I have always been primarily responsible for the bills and financial decision-making. I'm ready to be on my own, like I was before, and get the show on the road. How do you deal with these co-financial issues?

Round two of the depositions is over. Stakes are set pretty high for both attorneys. At the end of our conversation, my attorney, while walking to our respective cars, said I really needed to realistically think about what I could be okay living with if this case were to settle.

At first, I was alarmed, thinking, "Oh, no," that she felt this was our only option, however she quickly quelled that fear, and went on to say that she didn't think we wouldn't win if we went to trial, just that it would be very expensive, and that she realized I wasn't in the position to fork over a ton of money, and that, ultimately, she would do what I needed her to.

However, as a mother, I know what she meant by thinking realistically about what I could and could not live with.

So, here I am, at the drawing board, thinking of hypothetical situations that I really don't want to consider. But, I'm putting myself in the shoes of my boys, ages five and seven, and considering their needs.

My parents weren't around for me. They'd passed on when I was five, and I know that having two parents around is more beneficial than having one. I'd like to think I'll make a very good decision.

It just hurts to know that it isn't my wants, or what I'd dreamed of in terms of what I expected for my own family. But, I am respectful enough of my boys to know that this is a huge decision that will affect them for their entire lives, so I don't want to feel guilty and accountable for making a wrong one.

Agh!

I've reached the point — again — where I need to replenish my attorney fees. I'm going to have to open a new credit card or borrow money from someone. I will also probably have to not make payments on my house.

My ex refuses to pay any portion of the house, even though he's aware of the repercussions of the home not being paid. He just doesn't want to assist me financially. It took him months to even provide any child support payments, and he only did that because he knew it was considered to be temporary.

I hate that people can be so cruel during this process. I mean, I know my attorney needs to be paid. But, does everyone have to be such an ass all the time? Why can't he just say, look, I'll pay a portion of the payment, but let's agree to put the house on the market, and we'll go from there?

I can make reasonable decisions, but not with someone else's name attached to everything I do, you know? I wish there were some easier options than what I'm going through. Financially, I'm going to be in ruins for a while.

But, after all is said and done, I will have paid to be freed from a horribly abusive relationship, and I'm really okay with that. Of course I wish that weren't the case, but the money involved is worth the investment.

I'm in a point now where if I don't find some answers on how to proceed with my finances, I'm going to be in a serious financial debacle.

I've now been separated for seven months. I live in a house that was refinanced and got an equity line of credit. I'd sell the house, if the market showed any positive influx of buyers. In my community, however, it doesn't seem to be a prime location. I'd also probably take a loss on the house — but my income is being eaten up by the mortgage payment.

I finally have an order for some child support, but it's insignificant compared to the cost of living in the house and my children's care.

On top of generally not having enough money to keep up with our affairs, I have my attorney fees, counseling fees, the guardian ad litem's fees, and the psychologist fees for an upcoming psych evaluation. The bills just keep rolling in — and there just isn't any money to roll out.

I want to make wise money decisions as my name is separated from most of our old accounts — to start my own credit history — but I worry that I won't be able to continue keeping up on the debts that are still currently equally in my name.

My attorney has asked for additional financial assistance to retain property and credit scores, but there isn't any guarantee that my ex will agree to this. Any advice or suggestions you have would be greatly appreciated.

I have calculated that since the time my ex and I separated, back in July, that I have accumulated over $10,000 worth of attorney's expenses. So, that averages to $1,666 per month, which sadly enough is very close to my individual take-home salary.

My case isn't going to end quickly. Because there is a child custody dispute issue, my trial might not even be until July of next year.

I'm a fairly financially savvy individual, and I'm feeling the pressure of the continued attorney bills that are going to come my way, through the process of an upcoming trial.

Not only is the accruing debt insurmountable, but I need to make some decisions in the interim about my home, job, and the expenses that are associated with both. I admit, I've not always been a financially fit gal. I sacrificed a lot of peace of mind that I wanted in life to support my husband's dream of everything bigger and better, and to make more and more money to have the "grass on the other side of the fence."

Wonder if he likes his grass now...

I certainly am not chipper about mine, but want to try and be a responsible person with the circumstances of this divorce so that I can piece my life back together and move on. It sucks to look at figures this way and say, my divorce is costing me over $1,000 a month — but I do know, that if I had stayed in my marriage, I would have lost a lot more than money. I have no regrets, just want to make some sound decisions.

How much has your divorce cost you?

Friends have told me that it seems as though my ex is out to "right a wronged child". Granted, he is ten years older than me, so this could be a complex issue that he has. I just want out. I want to have my own personal space. I want to be able to live harmoniously with the personal boundaries I've set. I want my children to live peacefully.

Apparently, this is too much to ask. I'm still sitting without any child support payments. I get new motions for anything and everything filed almost weekly. I owe another $5,000 to my attorney to replenish my retainer, and we've not even really started working on our dissolution of marriage yet. We're still just fighting custody upheavals.

The good news is that we finally have a guardian ad litem assigned to the case, and they will be looking out for the children's best interests. I surely hope they get to know my children quickly and see that I have always been providing for them wholeheartedly. This process is grueling and not at all fair.

I've never been in such a tight spot financially in my life. I have not received any assistance financially so far through the divorce process, something that is being addressed quickly, as my boys will soon be the victims of my spouse's financial attack against me. I hate that they are so fragile in this process and placed in the middle — indirectly or not.

For two months, I've held the house stable, paying all of the bills, on my own — but obviously, the pennies are running low. The value of money is starting to lose its hold on me. I never was a very materialistic person, and always have been a penny pincher. But, when you have very few pennies to pinch, I guess that quest seems somewhat futile.

I'm adequately pursuing assistance from other means, food co-ops, subsidized health care — anything that will help me stay above the zero balance. I've had offers for financial assistance from my church, which is embarrassing on one hand, but on the other, I'm grateful that others know the financial repercussions of divorce and what I'm going through. I'm not on my own in my financial woes.

I can't help but be angry at my spouse for leaving his children without proper funding — he's just holding out, hoarding his money. He was always the spender in our family. I wonder if his materialism will ever lessen. His attacks on me continue.