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We're Going To Be Okay
Finding hope during divorce can be a deep internal struggle. There's a point where you look at your spouse, you love them dearly, care about their well-being, but in the end, you have to put your heart and gut before their needs.
This was a huge undertaking for me. This was really the first time in my marriage that I honestly put myself first. It's sad to say — to acknowledge — but it's the truth.
So many people choose to stay married for the sake of their children. I couldn't sacrifice myself anymore. I realized their well-being, as well as mine, was just far too important to continue to remain in an abusive relationship.
It seems simple enough, that I should have never allowed my needs, desires, and wants to be placed at the bottom of the list, but they sat there for years. I would look into the faces of my children and force fun into our lives. It was exhausting.
Unhappiness in my heart swelled, with no release. Tension rose for quite some time, before threats were made and I asked my husband to leave our home. After he did, I saw so much light and hope.
I knew that I was going to be okay, despite what divorce meant spiritually, emotionally, and financially. I truly saw hope swelling my way. We're going to be okay.
Never too late to start again
I started in what turned out to be an abusive relationship in my early 40s and am getting out--after too long--at 56. I'll admit I feel a loss for the time I put into what turned out to be a failed relationship, but I am also full of hope for the future. I put myself at the bottom as well. I was concerned with fixing him, being there for his daughters and their daughters (my step granddaughters) and there was no time for me. Now, I savor each moment I have relish my time to myself. I look forward to another relationship, eventually, but next time (for sure) it will be with someone who comes to me as a whole person not someone in need of repair.
Time for you
I always craved time for me, and this was something I was not allowed to have. I do enjoy the time I get to myself now. I'm still getting used to being independent and the emotional struggle is difficult.
Taylor Raine
Staying too long
Taylor, you will be an inspiration to many women. No one wants a divorce, however sometimes it's so much better to leave. Allowing yourself to stay in an abusive relationship is worse.
Good luck with your new world, it will be brighter and you will be blessed with more rainbows..wish on them all..
Thanks for sharing for every women, wondering if she should stay in an abusive relationship..Get out as safely and quickly as you can..
Dorothy from grammology
call your grandma
Rainbows
I hope for many rainbows. Right now, there is so much b.s. going on that it's difficult to see that light at the end of the tunnel. I'll keep my eyes out!
Taylor Raine
I admire your courage
I stayed until the girls were grown and off to college. Now I'm in my late 40's and I'd give anything to have had the courage to have walked away sooner. I admire your courage & hope that you stay strong!
Courage
You know, I never considered myself as courageous. I was scared as hell, and really still am. I make attempts to stay strong, for myself and for my kids. Thanks!
Taylor Raine