I was inside a building that blew up. Yep. KaBam! Boom! Pow!

When the explosion ended almost in a matter of one single second, I found myself blown out of my office chair and on my hands and knees under my desk.

What had just happened? I asked myself, completely unaware of the second and third degree burns that covered my feet, ankles, hands and face.
I immediately scrambled to stand and rushed to get out of the building, as I was quite certain another explosion was to come. I still had no idea what had happened.

That was 25 years ago, but the same emotional shock and confusion and even physical pain would come again when my divorce was final. What had just happened? Yesterday I was married. Today, I'm a single parent raising two young children on my own.

Divorce wreaks your life. So, if you're considering it, please make sure you know that there simply is no other way to survive, literally. If you can find a way to make it work, find that way and make it work.

Divorce is the last resort. It should not be used as an excuse to remove yourself from a situation that has become a little hard, challenging and less fulfilling than it once was. It should not be an excuse to go shopping again for something that you think might bring happiness to you.

Divorce is not an escape valve. It's serious business, and it breaks hearts each and every time.

I am in the "moving beyond" for FWW. That is who I am and what I am doing. It comes with its own set of challenges each day. It comes with its own unfulfillment, it's own lack luster. It's own boredom, strife, heartbreak.

My life got blown away by a gas leak ignited by a spark from the light switch that turned on an old PMT camera used to take a "slick" of an ad for the newspaper. One tiny spark and the whole building blew up. Cinder blocks were lifted and shoved over six inches. The ceiling caved in. A 12-ounce glass on my desk melted down to less than an inch in height. My world fell in and around on me.

That is what divorce does to your life. Even the worst marriage, and mine was definitely that, has a life. Divorce kills it.

I am grateful that I did not die in the building in Destin, Florida. And, I am grateful today that I am still living and moving beyond my divorce. My burns from the explosion healed with time. I still have some scars visible when I tan. And I have scars left from my marriage and subsequent divorce.

Think very carefully before you end your marriage. But if you do divorce, get ready for an explosion.