After Hurricane Katrina blew my life apart, but gave me the opportunity to escape my prison sentence with Stinky, I was in what some people call a bit of a state of shock. I was traumatized. Yep, that storm blew my house, my children's school, and my office away, and Stinky had knocked me clean stupid.

So, though it's been two and a half years, sometimes I long for those first months (okay, it was actually a year) of being so confused and unhappy and scared that I couldn't hold down a full time job and was afraid to really do anything more than get up, get the kids to school, and brush my teeth.

That's when I found my new friends: Crown Royal and Mimosa. Mmmm. I had no money, but I actually bought the complete collection of all six seasons of Sex In the City and after the kids were in school, I would come home and I would put in the next DVD open a bottle of Frexinet Brut or Extra Dry, mix a mimosa and sit down to plunge into complete oblivion watching four hip chicks living their lives in the Big Apple.

Ahhh. Those were the days. By noon, the champagne was gone along with a king sized bar of Hershey's dark chocolate, I would lay down and sleep for two hours, awake refreshed, brush my teeth, again, and go get the kids.

Then after baths and homework and giggles and stories of their day, and once they were both snuggled in for the night, I would shower, slip into my bed and put in the next DVD and hit play. I would also begin drinking the four Crown Royal highballs that would lull me into a deep sleep, so deep that I would not have the nightmares that had plagued me the first few weeks after my departure from the coast of Mississippi.

I tried to find work. I sent out resumes all over the Web. I went on interviews. I took several jobs. I quit as many. It was an insane and blurry time. But, I am glad I took the time I needed to allow myself to stop accomplishing and start healing. I wouldn't recommend drugs or alcohol necessarily, but I do recommend that you give yourself the biggest break ever. Get off your back and allow yourself to shut down.

Maybe shutting down for you is pouring yourself into your career or hobby. Maybe shutting down comes in the form of immersing yourself in parenting the best you possibly can. Maybe it comes in the form of running five miles every day and doing yoga. Whatever. It doesn't matter. Just let it happen.

You have been wounded beyond anything you have ever experienced. Divorce simply sucks. You will recover eventually, but if you don't let yourself have a breakdown for an extended period of time, you never will truly heal. Trust me on this one.

Eventually you will gain back a sense of yourself. But you might have to lose a few friends along the way. I rarely see Mimosa these days, and Crown Royal has left town for good. Ah well, I did love them so, but they took up too much of my time.