When the pressure of work, family drama, and troubled marriage overwhelm, I fantasize about leaving town, changing my name, and dropping off the grid for a small but self-sufficient life in the southwestern desert. I don't have much money of my own, but then I don't imagine needing much.

A beat up truck, a dog as companion, and a cozy adobe cottage — that's all I'll need. A pressure-free job at a local dive would pay the bills. I'll be perfectly content writing, exploring desert canyons, and kicking back with a few new friends over beer on rusty porch chairs. No father with Alzheimer's disease to worry about, no student loans to pay, no ambitious career or lifestyle plans in a fast-paced, high-priced northeastern city to frustrate the calm.

Such is my escape fantasy. Do we all have one? Do some people act on them? Are they the brave or crazy among us? I suppose that depends on how troubled their lives were, on how likely they could heal or remain safe, staying put.

This week I depart for a short Mexican vacation. A dear friend who lives on the opposite coast is meeting me for an escape to the beach. We'll sleep in a cabana on the jungle's edge, read in hammocks, and practice yoga on the shore. I anticipate warm air, fresh seafood, and easy conversation.

The temptation to relinquish obligations back home will tug hard. I'll relish the thought of staying behind in a paradise marvelous not so much for its sand and sea as for its lack of strings attached. But no person is an island. I'll be back.

I live far from my family. My husband's job demands frequent moves, so we go where his business is. I grew up in one part of the country and now I live in another.

Although the area we live in now is decent, I would probably not choose to live here of my own volition. I miss the beauty of my home state, and I miss my family terribly.

If I leave my husband, I'm going to find a little apartment here and stay in this area for as long as my husband does.

Yes, it would be much easier to pack up the kids and head back home, where I could undoubtedly stay with some relatives until I get on my feet. They probably wouldn't charge me rent or make me pitch in for groceries, and I'm pretty sure that they would be more than happy to take the kids occasionally so I could go job hunting or just have a few moments to myself.

So why won't I move back home? The main reason is this: Just because I want to leave my husband doesn't mean my kids want to leave him, too. They adore him. He's a good father, and my daughter favors him quite a bit.

Now don't get me wrong. I don't think that they would fare better with him if I granted him full custody. His patience with them is pretty thin after all-day exposure, but when he's gone at work all day and then comes home he's the coolest person ever, as far as the kids are concerned.

If we split up, it'll be hard enough for my kids, but if they're suddenly moved to an entirely different part of the country and never get to see the father who they adore, well, I'm pretty sure that's a recipe for therapy by the time they hit their 20s.

The plan is to stay right here in a town where I have no family and no reason to stay other than my husband, who — even if he becomes my ex-husband — is still the father to my kids. It will become really messy if he gets transferred to an entirely new location, but for now this is the only solution I can think of.

I write for a variety of Web sites. I'm really blessed to have steady work from a lot of different sources. I also do some editing work for a couple of sites, so all in all, I'm all over the Internet on a regular basis. My husband knows the name of some of the places I write for, and once in a while he'll Google me to show off to his coworkers, but for the most part he doesn't really pay too much attention to where my work goes.

Needless to say, he doesn't know that I write for this Web site. 

The other day I walked into the house and my husband was waiting for me in the entryway. "I read some of the stuff you wrote on your baby blog," he said, and then immediately followed that up with, "I don't like the way you made me sound."

It was one of the first times he had ever sought out some of my writing online and actually read it, and of course the first thing he stumbled upon was the baby blog. The article he found was one where I discussed how many babies we wanted to have, and how I only wanted one or two while he was willing to go for four. The post was designed to be entertaining for people to read, but he saw it as a personal attack.

That night I was working on the computer while he watched some TV. Out of nowhere he said, "Do me a favor and send me a list of all the Web sites you write for, would you?"

I'd like to think that he's decided my writing is worth reading and that he can't wait to dig into my long list of bylines and see what kind of stuff his wife can churn out. I think a more accurate assumption, however, is that he wants to check up on me and see what horrible portrayals of him I'm putting out there. Because, after all, it's all about him, isn't it?

I haven't sent him the list yet. Heck, he can just Google me like everyone else.

I started writing about a year and a half ago. I've always enjoyed writing and during the period of time when my husband was so efficiently and intentionally ignoring me, I decided to go ahead and try to score a paid writing gig, which luckily for me happened pretty quickly.

My writing career grew exponentially after that, much to my husband's dismay. Although he claims to be proud of the writing jobs I get, he has more than once complained about how inconvenient it all is for him.

I still maintain the house and I am still 100 percent responsible for the kids throughout the day, so it isn't as if I ignore my responsibilities in order to get some writing done. I write at night sometimes, but if I try to do that too often my husband gets quite annoyed. Essentially, I try to write when my son naps or sometimes when the kids watch a DVD.

It's as if I'm sneaking in some putrid habit and hiding it from my husband. Ever since I told him I wanted to leave he agreed to give me a couple hours on the weekend to go do something on my own, and more often than not I use that time to write since I don't get much time otherwise.

Recently I received a few copies in the mail of a book I contributed to. This put me into the realm of a published author, and I was thrilled beyond belief. My husband, on the other hand, did not even bother to open one of the books and read my chapter, and I was completely crushed. He did read it eventually (in the bathroom, as a matter of fact), and he told me it was "good." That was the sum of his reaction.

Is it too much to ask to have a husband who is excited about my accomplishments?

So I’m finally going to get divorced. I’ve decided. It’s for real this time. And what led me to this decision, you ask?

I need a passport. My career has finally started to take off, and I’ve been invited to a few conferences in the U.S. I live in Canada, and the rules are changing about the identification you need to cross the border. I used to be able to get away with just my birth certificate, but now they want a passport.

The trouble is, I’ve already changed my name to my new husband’s. My health card, my bank card, my credit cards all use my new name. If I get a passport, they’ll have to use my old name, which belongs to my soon-to-be ex-husband.

This is obviously not acceptable, so I’m getting divorced.

Like I said in last week’s post, my future mother-in-law is starting to get nervous. She’s looking to see her first-born son get married, and I can hardly blame her. All this living in sin and making bastard babies must be stressful on her.

There might be more stupid reasons to get divorced, but if there are, I haven’t heard of them.

Things are full steam ahead here at First Wives World! In the coming weeks, you'll begin to see some new faces here on FWW, and a few old ones in new roles.

Beginning this week, you'll see two new faces on the House Blogger team, bringing you their personal stories of divorce. We're very excited to have Alice Brooks coming on board later this week. Alice is just beginning her divorce after ten years of marriage to her high school sweetheart — the only man she ever dated! She'll be bringing her uniquely humorous take on life as a divorcée who has never dated.

Equally exciting is the addition of Karen Morath, who will be bringing some additional "international flavor" to First Wives World. Karen hails from Melbourne, Australia, has been divorced for six years, and will be sharing her story of raising three chidlren — 15, 13, & 10 — on the other side of the world.

Many of you may not have realized that we have international bloggers here on First Wives World, but we do — the lovely and talented Naomi Dunne, another recent addition, is from Ontario, Canada.

You'll also be seeing a change in the news blogging team. Beginning this morning, Donna Carlisle has taken over bringing you your daily dose of celebrity news each day at 11AM. We're very pleased to have Donna on board with us!

Samantha Louis, who has been providing the daily celeb spotlight, will now be applying her trademark spin to fun and funny divorce news on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday each week. And of course, there is the wonderfully talented quartet of Rachel, Amanda, Rianne, and Katherine with all the best news on the wire.

Here at FWW, we try to provide support and stories relevant to women in all stages of divorce. Our three "new additions" represent the first two stages of divorce: contemplating and navigating. They'll be sharing their stories of moving towards joining many of our other writers in the final stage, moving beyond.

Over the next two weeks, the ladies will be posting introductions to bring everyone up-to-speed on who they are, and then they'll begin to share their stories. Today we have a brief preview of what is to come:

Randie Thomas is separated from her husband of twenty-one years, and has two children aged 19 & 17. She will be sharing her progress towards divorce, and her struggle with vulvar cancer, including how her husband Dick decided to "start a new life" on the way home from her first surgery. Expect to see Randie start appearing this week.

Taylor Raine is in the middle of her divorce, preparing for mediation. She has two boys, 5 & 6, and will be sharing her struggle to maintain a stable home for them after her husband of nine years turned abusive. You'll see Taylor's story starting next week.

Also premiering next week is Naomi Dunne, who first considered divorce three days after her shotgun wedding. Naomi is the mother of an eight-year-old son who is just like his father, from whom she is separated. You'll be along for the ride as Naomi moves through the process of filing and navigating her divorce.

Please join us in welcoming these amazing women, and keep your eyes peeled as they begin to share their stories here on First Wives World.