I am past the age of being excited about baring it all in a bathing suit, or less. Statistics show I'm not alone.  

Four out of five American women say they're dissatisfied with the way they look.

On any given day, almost half of the women in the United States are on a diet. The average American woman is 5 foot 4 inches and weighs 140 pounds. Seen that on TV lately?

Tonight I'm going to be in a situation where I will be watching myself, on camera, at the preview of the film Momz Hot Rocks about the origins of the mom rock movement. It's a special sneak preview, with limited access, but still, my friends and neighbors will be there, and I'm hoping there won't be a sneak preview of my derrière.

I haven't seen the rockumentary yet, so I don't know what filmmaker Kate Perotti snuck in there. She did follow me and the other women in Housewives on Prozac for the better part of two years. I seem to remember a few indiscreet moments on camera, but all I can do is hope the lighting was bad.

Oh, and did I mention this? My new boyfriend's coming to the preview. So far I've managed to keep most of my flesh under wraps and in the dark. Hey, that's the way I like it. We're still getting to know each other and a little sense of mystery goes a long way.

Besides, I don't want that romping in the hay thing at this point in my life. I want loving, steady, sweet, kind and respectful.

In the process of growing up and growing older, I have become a softer, rounder, fuller version of myself. Learning to like the new me is a lot like learning to like the old me; fraught with pitfalls. Basically, it's not that easy to just "like" yourself.

This brings me to my favorite platforms: the need to go straight into the subject of inner beauty, especially once post-marriage dating begins. Inner beauty is all about self-love and self-acceptance. It's the courage to say, "I've found my place on the planet and it's unique and extraordinary and I'm not going to shrink of fade away from any of it."

Of course I wonder if my new romance will blossom in the light of day, and what the effects of my half-naked body, genuflecting in a midlife rock'n'roll stance, will have on my new beau?

There is still hope for all of us romantics, even though movie star kisses are a far cry from real life kisses. We've come to appreciate that there is value in choosing reality over fiction.

So, out with the old self-loathing. In with the new self-love, and time to get ready to see myself on the big screen.

Oh my gosh, I just realized. My daughter's coming tonight, too.

Well, maybe it's okay that as I learn to love myself she will have something to look forward to, in that far off time, past her own childbearing and career years.

If she should ever end up single, or in hardship, or fat, she may need those lessons in self-love and survival.

It's all part of the great Motherhood Movement. Just like the women at First Wives World, women at the Women's Media Center are changing the world through empowerment and community, one web site and one event at a time.