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Must Keep Moving Forward

Posted to House Bloggers by Akillah Wali on Sat, 04/05/2008 - 1:00pm

The week has flown by, and I feel as though I have very little to show for it. Coursework keeps piling up, no matter how much I try to get through. Life demands that I try to have one, and all the while, there's always that "one more thing" that I am supposed to have done before the end of the day.

Ain't life grand?

Mostly, I just want to crawl into a hole and wait for the madness to pass. Knowing that this is not an option, I just have to keep going — though sometimes it seems to be at a snail's pace, while other times, I don't seem to be moving forward at all. Fatigue, insanity, grief, and fear wreak havoc on my senses on a regular basis, while I plow through life like the hard-charging hellion everyone knows me to be.

Sometimes I wish there were more people who actually knew more about me — they would know that I barely have time for my own bullshit, let alone theirs and mine too. They would know that while I do believe that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that this does not mean I will allow them to submit my work as theirs. They would know that my saying "no" does not mean "maybe."

These are the days where I just need to excommunicate myself from the masses, but the masses won't let me.

I swear when this is all over, I am going to sleep for a week — with the ringer off.

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