One thing I can say about my divorce is that it was surprisingly civil. We worked with a mediator and our accountant to work out the financial details, kids visitation issues and the nitty gritty of who got what. Then our individual lawyers looked over the paperwork, blessed our disunion, and we signed on the dotted line. A year later, we were divorced and the whole business cost about $5,000.

Compare that with S, now into year two of his nasty divorce and endless depositions, attorney meetings, court dates. His ex has been playing the delaying game because he is paying all her bills until they reach an agreement. They get close to a settlement, she decides to switch lawyers. Another retainer check (ka-ching), another delay. I can't even begin to imagine the final tab on this divorce.

But then a funny thing happened in the Ex Wars.

After a long term relationship ended, S's ex went back trolling on the Internet where she soon netted a number of potential catches.

One, she decides to meet at a local restaurant. He joins her, they engage in small talk. "I'm a matrimonial lawyer," he said.

"That's funny, I'm going through a divorce right now," she responded.

"What did you say your last name was?" he asked.

When she told him, he abruptly rose and "recused himself" from the date. Seems he was on S's legal team.

Her lawyer immediately made a motion to force S to hire yet another lawyer, which was — thankfully — denied. But the incident did open an interesting can of worms.

One of the sticking factors in coming to an agreement has been her aversion to work. She is much too ill from various ailments, she maintains, to ever again hold even a part time job.