Oprah is one of life's great sources of the stuff you need to know. I am trying to set my life up so I can watch it every day.

Last summer, the show featured a book called Banker to the Poor by Muhammad Yunus. It offered great insight into the role of women in societies.

The book is the story of Yunus's invention of micro-credit, which is basically lending money to the poorest members of a community, the ones without collateral and the ability to fill out paperwork. He started it in his native Bangladesh and now it operates around the world.

The loans are often for $5 or $1, and they enable people to own the means of production, turning them from poorly paid employees to business owners. Oh, and micro-credit is extended to just women. Yep, women only.

Yunus believes that women run families and households and will ensure that the money well spent and repaid.

There is no bias about the marital status of the women except maybe to favor women who are the single heads of families. Everyone relies on them, and they are dependable. They have to be, simply by the nature of their situations.

This book is a great read for anyone, but it is especially affirming for divorcing or divorced women going it alone. I highly recommend it.

Do non-Australians understand the word "yobbo"? If not, it's a description of someone who is extremely laid back and a bit rough around the edges. Some people would consider it a compliment and others an insult. Normally a yobbo is an Aussie bloke but sometimes they can be women.

Anyway, there is an ad on TV here at the moment that I hate. It features a single mother who introduces herself as such in a yobbo accent that suggests she is a real "battler", another Australianism for someone who is poor and battling to make ends meet.

The point the advertiser is making is that even people as poor as single mothers can still get on in life if they use their service. The ad is for renting household equipment.

The poor stereotype is bad enough but the characterisation also suggests this woman isn't very well-educated and that people should both feel sorry for her and look down on her. Gee if she can rent a computer, maybe we can too.

I also read somewhere the other day that a factor in poverty is being a woman as we are more likely than men to lose out in divorce and have to cope with the incredible expense of raising children alone.

No doubt all of these descriptors are accurate to an extent. But I wonder whom they help? I would like to see the woman on the ad say "I researched a lot of deals on financing computers and this is the best available. Why not benefit from the homework I put in?"

Not just because it's a more positive portrayal of single mothers but also because it's more accurate. Single women are resourceful, frugal and survivors. Aren't we?

Cambodian marriages have a recipe for success. The woman is in charge. Excuse me while I pack my bags.

Seriously, the woman controls the money, makes the purchasing decisions, raises the family and is recognized as the matriarch. Both parties know it going in and it works really well.

In his imperfect English, one happily married Cambodian man told me that men go to work and bring home the money to their wives. Any man seen to be holding any money back for himself, other than lunch money at work, is seen by his male peers as "soft" or "you know, a bit gay." Good men bring home the bacon.

In describing how marriages work, he said that if a married couple were buying a new car and the woman wanted a red one and the man wanted a black one, they would buy a red one and everyone would be happy.

Part of the reason for the success of this traditional role-sharing arrangement is that Cambodian men really value the contribution of the homemaker. The fact that they come home from work to a house, a wife, children, clean clothes and meals is wonderful to them. Like most single working women, I think it sounds pretty good too!

I am not sure why all recipients of such an arrangement don't just appreciate it rather than feel the need to critique it like so many western men do.

This traditional role breakdown also works because it is communicated well. Both parties understand what their rights and responsibilities are and they work together as a couple rather than two individuals.

Of course, the fact that many women aren't educated for any vocation other than marriage conditions them to this way of life. And the fact that education for women is becoming a more accepted and even encouraged aspect of Cambodian life will make this nation interesting to observe over time.

Australian school kids get more than 12 weeks of holiday every year, and as mother of three of them, I want to spend as much of that time with them as I can. They won't be school kids forever.

But there's a hitch — the small matter of making a living!

Wanted: A really well paid job providing at least enough money to house, feed, educate, clothe, and entertain three children (and meet some of my needs at least). Must have flexible hours to accommodate after school activities, dentist appointments, regular haircuts, and trips to the newsagents for project materials. Must be close to home as there is no time to commute when there is dinner to make and uniforms to launder and iron. Needs 12 weeks holiday every year — paid of course — as the above expenses don't go on holiday with you.

Let me know if you know of any openings. Meanwhile I compromise my ambitions and potential and work a number of jobs for a variety of reasons.

I run my own consultancy and this enables most of the above — except all of the flexibility and time off is unpaid. Consulting jobs are notorious for their ups and downs, and single income household can't handle that.

So I have a teaching job or two. Fortunately I love teaching because I also like the regular pay and the holidays.

I write a bit, some paid and some not. Please, when the international best seller I know is in me comes out, think of my kids and buy a copy.

I make my work fit my family as best I can. I think that's a mum thing though — not just a single mum thing.

How do other mums make work fit family?

I read an article in the newspaper the other day about a woman who is a life coach specializing in divorce.

It struck me as a great idea. When I was newly separated I had three kids to raise, a financial settlement to handle, and an income to make. I'd just been jumping through the hoops of marriage counseling and hating it, so although having someone to talk to about what I was facing would have been wonderful, more counseling would have been anything but.

If I had heard of divorce coaches then, I would have been open to the idea of seeing one.

The woman in the article said she helped people make a plan for "rebuilding their whole structure" and helping people to focus.

Her role is about working with people to make a list of practical things that they need to get done and helping them to get the resources or the knowledge to do them.

The tasks can be as simple as paying bills — some people going through a divorce really don't know how. Her advice? "Go to the bank and get them to show you."

I was somewhat more independent than that but still think that sort of practical "coaching" from someone who'd helped others in the same position could have been really nice.