As I go through this class the second time around, I have found new meaning in the material provided to me.

The first time around, several months ago, setting boundaries meant just sharing my opinion about how my personal space was being affected and abused. Doing this was an extremely difficult undertaking for me. I'd been told that my needs weren't important, that my feelings weren't of concern and that I pretty much served little purpose other than to "provide" at my ex's beck and call.

I set a huge boundary when I asked for personal space in my marriage to sort through my feelings. Yes, I have feelings! Imagine that. I set another defining boundary when, because I asked for space and it was not given, I just didn't answer the phone or emails.

This leads me to ask, why is it that even as adults we test the boundaries of other people? I realize my ex had a lot to gain. I gave him everything I ever had to offer — and it was never enough. But, my question still remains, I'm curious to find out other's perspectives on this issue — why do adults, who should know better, tempt other people's boundaries? What is the gain in pushing people's buttons?