So here's a question for those of you who've been through a divorce: How did things go the first time you got intimate with some else?

I'm sure we can all have a long conversation about that topic. I saw a letter to a sex columnist that raised this issue, and it was interesting to me because it came from the male perspective. The writer was a 35-year-old divorced "bloke" (it was in a British publication) who said his girlfriend left him because he couldn't keep an erection. For the moment, we'll look past the fact that this must not have been much of a relationship if that was really the reason she left him. The guy is wondering if the remaining emotional weight of his divorce is somehow making it tough on him in bed.

And that's something a lot of divorced people probably face. It's not uncommon at all. A lot of sexual dysfunctions, especially in younger people like this guy, have more to do with the mind than they do with the body. If something like this happens and it's a consistent problem, it's probably worth taking to a therapist who specializes in sexual matters. It goes without saying that making such an appointment for yourself is a daunting step, especially if you're doing it alone. But a divorce can impact your mind in so many ways that you're not consciously aware of. A little help with a problem like this isn't too much for anyone to ask.

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