Faith Eggers' blog

Life for Levi and me seemed to be going along okay. I was excited about the baby and he seemed happy about the pregnancy as well. But now I realize things were roiling beneath the surface that I didn’t want to see.

One day, Levi and I were driving on the highway and I just knew, don’t ask how I did, but I knew what he was about to say wasn’t going to be good. I mentioned in an earlier post that Levi dumped me on the New York State Thruway—he did. It was awful. He didn’t want to be in our marriage or in our relationship.

I had a hard time accepting the fact that Levi had left me but it was real. It was right in my face. Whenever the reality and enormity of the situation would hit me, I'd push it way back into my brain. I completely convinced myself that I was overreacting, that this wasn’t the end and we were just having a hard time.

I tried to be patient. And, actually as soon as I started to take the patient, understanding stance (rather than the out of control, crying, screaming, generally freaked out stance), things seemed to change.  read more »

Levi paid so much attention to me that it was awkward at first, but then I started to like it. He would call me or e-mail me a couple of times a day. We had very easy conversations together and we laughed like crazy all the time.

I was really starting to like this guy.

We met in March and when we went on vacation together in July, he told me he loved me. We took his daughter on vacation with us in September and we all had a blast.

I began helping him on some projects, designing Web sites for bands, helping with video editing and production and other stuff. We made a good team and by October, Levi and I were living together.

I started spending a lot of time with his daughter too. I made dinners, cleaned the house, picked Levi’s daughter and her friends up at school and began falling into the wife role before I even knew it. But, I liked it. Levi made me feel safe, beautiful and intelligent. And he doted on me and bragged about me to his friends.

Okay, I was in love with him!

Levi asked me to marry him on our on-year anniversary of meeting. It wasn't anything super romantic—we were in bed and he just asked. Of course I said yes, and then hopped out of bed and called all of my friends. We were married on April 2, a little over a year since we’d met.  read more »

For our first date, Levi (my now-estranged husband) and I arranged to meet at a bar/club right down the street from my house. But, when we got there it was packed, standing-room only and really loud. There was a really crappy band playing and we both agreed that we didn't want to hang out there.

There really isn't much to do right in town, so he suggested another place that was a few miles out of town. I agreed, and he drove.

We had our first date over a few drinks and he told me about his career—he's a music agent/record producer—and he’d just bought a recording studio that he was very excited about and eager to show off. He told me about his daughter from a previous relationship.

I told him about college, about the manuscript I’d written and was eager to get published, the decision to move here and about my ideas for screenplays. All in all, it was a really good date and we seemed to click.

We were getting ready to leave when he told me that his new house/studio was right up the road and asked if I'd like to go see it? I said “sure,” but after a few drinks, I didn't really even think about saying “no.”  read more »

After graduating from college, I moved into a cute one-bedroom apartment right in the center of town. I walked everywhere and eventually made a lot of friends. I was working a lot, writing a lot (I'm an aspiring screen writer) and trying to figure out ways to make money. So I took up babysitting for awhile.

I began babysitting for a little girl named Susie and became friendly with her parents. One day, while I was dropping Susie off at home, her father started talking to me about being single, asking if I had a boyfriend (I didn't), asking if I was dating (I wasn't). He said “Oh, good.” Why? Because he had already given his friend, Levi, my phone number.

He went on to tell me that Levi had recently been divorced, was lonely and having a hard time finding someone to hang out and connect with.

I got back into my car and was totally freaked out. Here I was, 21, and these guys are like in their 40s (at least that’s how they looked to me…) And here some lonely, old divorced guy has my home phone number. Gee, thanks!  read more »

My husband left me when I was six months pregnant with our son. His business had failed, he was losing money, he was miserable and I didn’t know it. 

Our son is four months old now and I’m still reeling.

Looking back, I realize that I was so wrapped up in thoughts of our son—what we were going to name him, what we were going to do with him, fantasizing about what he was going to look like, about taking him on his first trip to the beach, that I didn’t even notice that my life was slipping away at the same time I was plotting out every piece of what was to come. 

Levi, my estranged husband, had been planning to move out well before he told me he was. In fact, truth be told, he didn’t actually tell me he was moving out until he already had.  No, I wasn’t that oblivious, I did notice furniture missing, trucks leaving my house, etc., but he told me he was putting furniture we didn’t need in storage. I trusted him, why wouldn’t I?

I finally found out that he was leaving, that he had in fact already rented an apartment in Manhattan (we live upstate), while we were driving back from the doctor one day. Yes, my marriage fell apart on the New York State Thruway!   read more »