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My husband dumped me and blames me!

Details: Category: MyBlog; Published on Thursday, 07 August 2008 05:49; Written by Gail Custy; Hits: 11

So, I learned back in November (2007), my husband had a lover -- Audrey -- a woman at his workplace! He had the gaul to tell me back in November that, "at his age, you look around and tell yourself you want something better"! This is a crushing thing to learn from your husband. Worst part of all this -- SHE knew he was married and even met me earlier that year, when she had us over to her house for a visit! She was married at the time (has 2-kids). It was actually back then, I first felt there was something wrong -- HER husband pointed out to me that MY husband and HIS wife seemed AWFULLY friendly. I agreed, and on the drive home, raised my concerns. It was a typical response from my husband, he got his back up and was completely defensive--telling me I was making up the accusation, that her husband never raised this point; and that it was WAY off base and not even close to the truth (of their relationship). Well, months later... my husband dumped me, and I found love letters on his blackberry, photos of her and her kids in his work-stuff, condoms in his coat pocket, and invoices on the shared credit card for extremely pricey gifts [including a $250 Coach bag!). I was shocked! My world came crashing down. He defended himself -- telling me that it was nothing! and Then, when he could no longer get out from the fact he was 'caught' he blammed me, telling me he was VERY unhappy in the marriage, that I was a bitch and crazy and was controlling, and selfish. It makes things worse to find this out... that he felt this way about me! That, all the years we were married 14+ he hated every bit of it. I suppose I should have known, he never showed me much affection -- claiming that he just wasn't like that! I accepted it for all the years of our marriage. But, know I learn he was only like that with me! With her, he holds her hand, writes her love letters, carries her photograph, rendevoused with her for early morning, and late night gatherings. He even took her away on vacations (calling them business trips... because they worked together!). Once, he even braved a snow-storm in order to be by her side! I feel like a fool, and I am heartbroken... I feel unloved and alone. I am angry, very angry. He is bouncing around with joy! Claiming that I have always been angry and why he felt the need to turn to this woman! It is AMAZING how this man can take his adultery and turn it around and name me the cause of it! Both him and her knew exactly what they were doing wrong! And yet they did it with full intent! Both are guilty! I HATE it when friends and people tell me I cannot blame her. That she is not at fault. This to me is a sick way to look at adultery, when the woman KNOWS the man is married -- YES, 100% she is as guilty as he is! Sisterhood should be stronger than the urge to be with another woman's husband. This bitch had me in her home! The very home she toured me around for the first time -- telling me that my husband Praveen, didn't need a tour he had been there once before -- slept with my husband! In HER very home. It is SICK that he can dump me, and name me as the person that DROVE him to her. He drove himself... in his fancy-ass BMW that I helped pay for!