I came across an article by Bill Sanders from Cox News Service today. Published at Newsobserver.com, Bill's article puts a face on divorce — a very young face.

Sanders wrote about Bill Sears, a 16-year-old so scarred by the experience his parents put him through that his life will never be the same.

At seven, Bill's parents split up and he become judge, jury, psychologist and counselor to two fully grown, supposedly mature adults. That's so wrong that I can't even begin to put my thoughts in words.

Bill put his experience to good use and opened billsarena.com, a website devoted to educating both parents and children on divorce. It's pretty obvious the adults in his life (and in the lives of many other kids) needed the advice and the help.

I say, "Good for Bill for taking a hugely negative experience and turning it into a positive, helpful resource."

I also think, "Shame on Bill's parents for exploiting him so badly that they traumatized him so deeply."

I'm separated — twice. My first child distrusts men, doesn't have any interest in boys (and she's a thriving, beautiful teen) and doesn't want me to have relationships with anyone. We dealt with our separation poorly, and she suffered.

My second daughter is happy and well adjusted. She has no fears, thinks that most people live in separate houses and knows that family is who you love, not who you live with. We handled our separation all the right ways with her.

So if you're planning a separation or a divorce, maybe you should stop and think twice before you act, especially if you have kids. Deal with the situation properly and as painlessly as possible — not for you, but for your children.

I'm saddened to say that Bill's resource should be the place you visit and educate yourself about the emotional effects your separation might have on your kids. I'm also glad that Bill may help people behave better when splitting up.