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What can we learn from serial celebrity break-ups, billionaire bust-ups, misbehaving spouses, pants-on challenged politicos and the ever-shifting landscape of divorce law?? Question is, "What CAN'T we learn"? With latte in hand and clicky finger at the ready, dive in for the best in divorce news, views, gossip, and buzz – assembled below for your reading pleasure. Being in "d" know is just clicks away.

Linda Lee's picture

The Cost to Men for Committing Adultery? Not Enough.

Posted by Linda Lee on Mon, 08/18/2008 - 12:14am

Married men are 7 percent more likely than married women to commit adultery. And when a man has an affair, he doesn’t seem to consider the consequences of his actions. So says a study to be published in the fall, “So What Did You Do Last Night? The Economics of Infidelity.”

Infidelity for women peaks at 45, the study found. For men, it peaks at age 55.

Gee, what 55-year-old confessed adulterer has been in the news this week?

John Edwards, who claimed a week ago that he at least had been “99 percent honest” in his statements about the young filmmaker Reille Hunter.

“… [A] wealthy, famous politician such as John Edwards is a man with plenty of opportunity, and it seems that he gave the costs of getting caught little consideration. [That] fits well with our findings,” Bruce Elmslie, an economics professor in the Whittemore School of Business and Economics at the University of New Hampshire and a co-author of the study, told Firstwivesworld.

The study, co-written with Edinaldo Tebaldi, assistant professor of economics at Bryant University in Rhode Island, was based on data from the United States General Social Survey.

It is unusual in that it looks at infidelity from a cost-benefit analysis, rather than a sociological or psychological point of view.

Other points made in their study:

1. Men who are more likely to commit adultery:
• Live in cities (where there is greater opportunity to escape discovery)
• Do not have a college degree
• Do not belong to any particular socioeconomic group

2. What men do not take into account when having an affair:
• The economic status of the new woman, or her ability to bear children
• Their wife’s educational level
• Religion

"As with spousal education, men don't weigh the costs — spousal quality or eternal damnation — when deciding whether or not to have an affair," Elmslie said.

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Maureen Dempsey's picture

Same-Sex Couples Key To Lower Divorce Rate?

Posted by Maureen Dempsey on Wed, 06/11/2008 - 11:24am
Researchers are examining same-sex relationship dynamics to see how to improve heterosexual couples' success rates, reports The New York Times. The differences? Heterosexual women are delegated not only housework, but relationship work — and they're tired of carrying the responsibility for two. Additionally, heterosexual couples tend to become more physically agitated — elevated heartbeat and adrenaline surges — than their same-sex counterparts. The answer? Perspective. To find a little, click here.
Maureen Dempsey's picture

Post-Divorce, Older Daters Are Easy

Posted by Maureen Dempsey on Wed, 06/11/2008 - 10:22am
Lavalife Prime, an online dating site for singles 40+, shows that post-divorce daters are more laidback. "Unlike younger daters who are searching for that special someone, older daters aren't looking for a partner to make them complete. Of the prime daters on Lavalife, only 14 percent listed getting married or moving in together as a goal," a Lavalife spokesperson told Vaughn Today. For those (fearfully or reluctantly) reentering the singles scene, it's reassuring to know online dating is not synonymous with "desperate."

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Maureen Dempsey's picture

Viagra: The Gateway Drug to Divorce?

Posted by Maureen Dempsey on Wed, 05/28/2008 - 4:05pm

The magic little pill may spell trouble. According to a June 2008 report, a Harvard Medical School study said Viagra may add to marital stress. A couple used to dutifully kiss and go to sleep. Now he's popping pills, looking to reclaim his sexuality. Some wives may say Hallelujah, others may feel ambushed into re-creating his sexual fantasies. And all that while the laundry needs to be done.

Then there's another possibility. The study doesn't say it, but it's also possible he's met someone new, someone young and frisky. That's why he's taking Viagra.

Read more here.

JulieSavard's picture

Having Sex? No Divorce for You

Posted by Julie Savard on Thu, 05/15/2008 - 1:46pm

Now here's something smart: If a man keeps on having sex with his wife, he can't get a divorce.

So says Additional District Judge (ADJ) Atul Kumar Garg of New Delhi, India, in a recent ruling after a man sought separation from his wife for cruelty (she refused to carry out household chores) and misdemeanor.

I'm right behind the judge on this one.

We often hear of a man or woman complaining about their spouse, yet the fun in the bedroom still seems to be going on. If two people truly can't get along in a relationship, one would assume that there's no need to continue the affairs between the sheets.

Garg agrees. "Continuous cohabitation with the wife shall amount to condonation of the act of cruelty complained of and condonation in matrimonial cases means complete forgiveness of the act,"stated ADJ Garg when he laid down his ruling.

The act of divorce should be representative about two people who have no love or desire to live with each other. They shouldn't get along. They shouldn't be sharing intimate moments. It just doesn't make sense.

Jasbir Singh is the plaintiff requesting the divorce, and this is his second attempt to have the divorce approved by a court of law. He'd requested a divorce previously in 2003 — that didn't work, but obviously the relations between Singh and his spouse still did.

Now, five years later, Singh has had his divorce petition turned down again. Shall we all stay tuned for round three?

Perhaps the next time he seeks official separation, Singh will put chances on his side and stay away from temptation. It might help his credibility a touch.

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Maureen Dempsey's picture

Robin Williams’ Wife Files for Divorce

Posted by Maureen Dempsey on Wed, 03/26/2008 - 2:50pm

Marsha Garces Williams has filed for divorce from her husband of 18 years, citing irreconcilable differences.

The two met while Marsha nannied Robin's son with his first wife, Valerie. She then served as his personal assistant...then, uh, wife. Seriously, though, Marsha partnered with her husband professionally on several projects, producing Mrs. Doubtfire, Patch Adams, and Jakob the Liar.

The two also forged a nonprofit arts foundation alongside individual philanthropic endeavors.

Just watching this guy makes me tired. Imagine trying to keep up with him? I wouldn't have made it 18 days, let alone 18 years.

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Faith Eggers's picture

"Gray Divorces" Replacing Silver Anniversaries

Posted by Faith Eggers on Tue, 03/25/2008 - 1:36pm

Researchers say that the divorce rate for people in their 50's, 60's, and even 70's are increasing at an almost rapid rate and are dubbing these divorces, the "gray divorce" — as opposed to the silver anniversary.

And just when you thought that once you got over that 30-years-of-marriage hurdle you were in the clear. I don't know, I'd still be pretty hard pressed to imagine my grandmother and grandfather calling it quits after so many years of putting up with each other. Why would they?

One researcher suggests that as our life expectancy increases, there are more years to think of "putting up" in an unhappy marriage.

Divorce and family law attorney Carol Lindsay suggests that as a person ages there is a "vague longing." "Mortality is calling," she says, and sometimes people will feel a sense that they've missed out on something and try to make it up.

She does note that these "gray divorces" are sometimes nicer, as older couples will sometimes show "more maturity" and be "graceful" in the way they handle their divorce. Also, rarely are there the gut-wrenching, bitter, custody battles that are so common when younger couples divorce.

So, it seems that we can say again, divorce can effect everyone, divorce doesn't discriminate. Click here for more.

Maureen Dempsey's picture

McGreevey Divorce Twist

Posted by Maureen Dempsey on Mon, 03/17/2008 - 9:47am

The Star Ledger is reporting that a former aide to ex-governor says he repeatedly had sex with the McGreeveys.

Yes, that's plural "McGreeveys," as in a little three-way action with Jim and Dina. Whoops!

Twenty nine-year-old Theodore Pedersen says Mrs. McGreevey was more than aware of her husband's homosexuality and was in "complete control" of their three-way relationship.

Pedersen says the trysts started in 1999 but stopped when McGreevey was elected governor in 2001.

Three ways? Hmmmm...Would a governor-in-training and his wife be careless enough to engage in such come-back-to-haunt-you behavior?

Then again, we know another gov who (foolishly) thought his skeletons would remain safely locked in the closet.

If the McGreeveys did partake in a menage a trois with young Theodore, they had to have seen this coming.

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Naomi Dunne's picture

Shocker: Divorce Spikes In Egypt

Posted by Naomi Dunne on Sun, 03/16/2008 - 11:00am

Like everywhere else in the world, divorce rates are rising in Egypt. It's not too surprising, really — we've written before about the rising statistics of divorce in basically every country where it's legal. According to an article I recently read, though, the rate of divorce in Egypt isn't just up. It's way up.

It seems that almost 50 percent of couples are getting divorced. That's comparable to most of the Western world, but rare for an Islamic country. Here's the interesting part, though — these couples are getting divorced within the first four years of marriage, and one of the two leading causes is sexual frustration.

Islamic and sociological scholars are blaming the harsh rules on sexuality outside of marriage. Apparently, even kissing outside of marriage is condemned. While I'm sure that keeps their teen pregnancy rates down, it doesn't take a genius to figure out why the Egyptian people are frustrated.

In the Western world, we experienced similar troubles until the advent of birth control and the womens' lib movement. The difference was that in our society prior to that, divorce was still largely stigmatized and woman couldn't really work. Apply the same sexual rules to economically free couples who are able to get divorced whenever they want to, and you've got yourself a one-way ticket to splitsville.

Let's face it, if you tell a bunch of adolescents and young adults that they can't get past first base without getting married, you're going to see a lot of ill-advised weddings. What did they think was going to happen?

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Katherine McKee's picture

How Do Women Survive Infidelity?

Posted by Katherine McKee on Fri, 03/14/2008 - 2:35pm

Just how do women get through infidelity in marriage? Does infidelity always lead to divorce?

These are questions the media and armchair pundits are pondering in the aftermath of the Spitzer sex scandal. Psychologists and academics say the obligation to remain sexually faithful to one's spouse continues to carry a lot of weight, at least in the U.S. In France and Italy, it's something else altogether. But in the U.S., among all the marital problems one can have, infidelity is the one most likely to lead to divorce.

Sociologists' research on infidelity shows that men are routinely motivated by sex, while women stray outside the bounds of marriage in search of emotional intimacy, the kind they're not receiving from their spouse. Yes, more men than women cheat, but the numbers are increasing for both genders.

In fact, a 1994 study by sociologist Edward Lauman found that 10 percent to 11 percent of spouses had cheated in the previous year; over a lifetime, the study revealed about 18 percent of women and 24 percent of men reported an extramarital affair. More recently, a 2006 Pew Research Center survey found that nearly 90 percent of participants said it's morally wrong for married individuals to have an affair, which may or may not involve sex. Nearly the same percentage said adultery is morally wrong.

Notably, experts say that wives are more likely to forgive a cheating spouse and remain in the marriage particularly if the infidelity was committed with a prostitute or a one-night stand, versus a mistress or someone with whom a longer-term emotional bond was formed. However men are much less forgiving of their cheating wives; most don't tolerate their wives' indiscretions and view infidelity as a statement about their manhood.

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