

What can we learn from serial celebrity break-ups, billionaire bust-ups, misbehaving spouses, pants-on challenged politicos and the ever-shifting landscape of divorce law?? Question is, "What CAN'T we learn"? With latte in hand and clicky finger at the ready, dive in for the best in divorce news, views, gossip, and buzz – assembled below for your reading pleasure. Being in "d" know is just clicks away.

The Washington Post recently reported on Japan's declining marriage rate. Short story: Men are looking to wives to take over maternal roles, and that scenario isn't very appealing to most single Japanese women:
"There is the rarely stated but almost universal expectation of Japanese men to be fed, clothed and picked up after. 'I am willing to take care of and give comfort to a man whom I care about, but that does not mean I want to be his mother,' she said."
In fact, WaPost found that women who had married were less likely than their male counterparts to remarry after divorce. The article states that post-divorce, men are unhappy and remarry quickly, while "the women are relatively happy and often delay remarriage." Perhaps it's the "burn me once" theory?
In addition to the lack of women looking to take on the mommy role, a stalled economy and a posh home life are keeping adult children in their parents' homes. A Calgary Herald piece from early August reported that Japanese parents — fed up with housing, feeding, and taking care of their single adult children — were taking matters into their own hands and organizing events exclusively for parents to find mates for their children.
"A government report from 2005 showed 71.5 percent of men aged 25 to 29 were unmarried, compared with 47.1 percent in 1990. For women, 32 percent from 30 to 34 years of age were single, compared with half that number in 1990."
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The Australian posted a recent article on the impact of divorce on the environment. The claim? That the results of divorce — multiple homes, cars, energy use — is eating way at the earth's resources. One can't argue with that, especially as a new report by the Australia's Department of Environment, Water, Heritage and the Arts released the following numbers:
"A four-person family that breaks up will generate around 43 percent more garbage than they did when they were together. They will use up to 34 percent more water and up to 70 percent more energy, depending on the type of new dwellings being occupied."
But what we can argue with is the alternative: Stay in a broken relationship? And keep the kids there, too, just to cut down on the garbage and utilities? Please. A rise in energy consumption seems far less detrimental than forcing kids to stay in a glued-together, patched-up broken home. With the electricity they save now, they'll be running up their therapist's bill with all the hours they'll spend sitting on the couch in 10 years.
And let's remember, with second marriages come a union of two houses to one. Live Science reports that the environmental footprint of U.S. households who had "weathered divorce and remarriage shrank back to that of married households."
If researchers are looking to pin the environmental crisis on something, divorce is really the least of our worries.

The man who abducted his seven-year-old daughter in Boston last month was arrested in Baltimore over the weekend, and the girl was returned to her mother. On Tuesday the father was charged in a Boston court with felony parental kidnapping, assault and battery. He was held without bail.
And then the mysteries deepened.
Who is "Clark Rockefeller"? Could he be wanted in California under another name? Is he, as he presented himself, a secret agent? Or is he, as investigators believe, a former German exchange student?
Another question: How could his ex-wife, Sandra Boss, a high-powered executive at the London office of McKinsey & Co., be deceived by such a shady character? Actually, any woman who has ever been wooed by a psychopath will know the answer to that one.
The London papers reported that Boss, who made more than $1 million a year, paid "Rockefeller" $1.5 million last year in exchange for exclusive custody of their daughter, Reigh.
The sticking point for shared custody, Boss said, was that she wanted to see "Clark Rockefeller's" valid birth certificate, and to know, finally, who her husband of 12 years really was.
He refused to reveal his identity, took the money, and began plotting their daughter's abduction, including buying an apartment in Baltimore under another assumed name.
She, finally sure that he wasn't a Rockefeller, changed their daughter's last name to Boss.
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Jennifer Butler has filed for divorce from husband Bill Murray after more than a year of separation. The two have been married for 10 years and have four children.
Unfortunately, Butler's divorce petition detailed Murray's "adultery, addiction to marijuana and alcohol, abusive behavior, physical abuse, sexual addictions, and frequent abandonment."
Aside from a storied acting career, Murray is co-owner of the Charleston Riverdogs, a South Carolina minor league baseball team — although is official title on the team's web site is "Director of Fun." I don't know...from the aforementioned allegations, he doesn't sound like too much fun to me.
Seriously, though, it must be tough be married to these full-throttle, ad-lib kind of guys like Murray or Robin Williams (also in the midst of a divorce). Maybe the show never stops — and they never stop.
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Saudi men who divorce non-Saudi women are currently allowed to force their wives to leave the country and in many cases never see their children again.
Unlike in Western countries where marriage to a citizen grants automatic citizenship in and of itself, non-Saudi women who marry Saudi men do not get citizenship and can be asked to leave the country at any time. Since the children are the property of their father, the ex-wives can't take the kids with them.
One divorced mother of six who is originally from Syria told the Saudi Gazette that since she got divorced she has not been allowed to see her kids. She is terrified of being expelled from Saudi Arabia and never seeing them again. Her oldest child is only eight years old, and they "still need the care of their mother," she said.
The Saudi Arabian Foreign Ministry is in the process of examining possible solutions, including granting residence permits for women caring for their children.
While this is great in theory, I have a feeling that most Saudi ex-husbands will find a way to throw a monkey wrench into the best laid plans. The Foreign Ministry might let the women stay in the country, but the ex is under no obligation to let them anywhere near the kids.
While I sympathize with the plight of these women, there's an element of "What did you think was going to happen?" going on here. We've said it enough times before — Saudi Arabia is not exactly known for its women's rights movement, and the laws are barbaric at best. When it comes to Saudi marriage proposals, let the buyer beware.
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We reported a while back that more U.S. men are seeking alimony these days, and in a recent Telegraph article, it appears that British husbands are seeking financial support, as well.
One U.K. law firms states the number of men attempting to claim a piece of their wealthy wives' assets has increases threefold in the past year.
The number of "house husbands" has doubled over the past 20 years, as more women become the breadwinner. When it comes time for a divorce, SAHDs are looking to be compensated for their efforts.
I don't know about you, but it's not really a gender issue for me. If you've dutifully served as the homemaker and helped your spouse build a successful career, aren't you entitled to some sort of support?
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Men are hit harder by divorce. So says Statistics Canada after performing a 10-year study on the effects of divorce on both men and women.
It makes sense. Women tend to think long and hard over their decision to instigate a divorce. A psychologist once told me that women take up to seven years to decide on whether to divorce their husband or not — and that once the decision is made, there's usually no going back.
Most men seem surprised when they hear the announcement of the desire for divorce. "I never realized... I didn't think it was that bad... Divorce?" They're shocked. They haven't taken time to contemplate whether divorce is the answer.
The StatsCan study also mentions that men suffer from higher rates of depression — the rate for depression was six times higher that of women.
This too, is understandable. Women have greater support systems of friends and family. They have emotional backup to help them deal with the effects of a divorce.
Women also tend to become the main caregiver if children are involved. They have companionship, responsibilities to maintain and duties to uphold. The men? They're left with an empty home, a lack of people, and only their feelings to deal with.
It's a painful situation. Solitude, isolation, a lack of support...It sounds like a good recipe for depression to me.
However, StatsCan didn't offer much backup for the causes of the post-divorce depression rates in men. The governmental agency didn't correlate custodial losses or change in parental responsibilities as being the issue to blame.
Common sense, though? I think so. Divorce is difficult for anyone to face. The thinking patterns, life changes, and ways that men tend to cope with emotional situations offers plenty of reason for increased rates of depression.
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Divorce. It comes with some hefty baggage. And probably the heaviest cross to bear is the guilt of potentially damaging your children by splitting the family. But new research suggests that divorce doesn't appear to be the reason for some behavior problems, according to USA TODAY.
The recent article quotes Allen Li, associate director of the Population Research Center at the RAND Corporation in Santa Monica, as saying, "It really depends on the individual marriages and the family. My conclusion is that divorce is neither bad nor good."
Okay, we can work with that.
The study measured behavior problems, such as crying, cheating, or arguing frequently, in children ages 4 to 15. He found such a slight post-divorce increase in bad behavior that he deemed it statistically significant.
Li explained that bad behavior patterns such as these would have most likely been present in any home situation and was not a result of divorce or family turmoil.
Maybe that baggage just got a little lighter?
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Women's rights activists are up in arms about a contentious divorce case in Tennessee that may result in the local marital property laws to be changed. According to an article in Tennessean.com, "a wage-earning husband gets to keep $1.7 million in stock. His homemaker wife gets nothing."
Okay, I admit, when we're talking about the rights of the stay-at-home spouse — and let's face it, while many husbands including my own are starting to stay home, it's generally the wife — and there are a few million dollars in play, I can see why people are getting concerned. Some are suggesting that if this settlement goes through as is, it could be precedent setting and go against state laws.
But, and there's a really big but, I don't think that this case has anything to do with the wife being a homemaker. The court says that the husband is being allowed to keep the stock and not share it because all he did was hold it after receiving it as a gift from his father. Her employment status is irrelevant.
In my opinion — and I know this is going to make me the bad guy — when you decide not to work, you take a risk. A gift given to one individual is just that — a gift with only one intended recipient. If Daddy had given him a cheese knife, is she entitled to half of that, too?
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I have never been so angry in my life. Coming from a woman who separated from her husband after four months of marriage, that's saying something.
A girl in Yemen went to court last week to prosecute her father for making her marry a man 22 years her senior. She went to the court by herself looking for a judge to try her case. Her name is Nojoud Muhammed Nasser, and she is eight.
My son is eight. He does not yet have the hand-eye coordination to play his brand new PlayStation. He still needs me to cut his meat for him when it's too tough. On rough days, he still sleeps with his blankie.
"Whenever I wanted to play in the yard he beat me and asked me to go to the bedroom with him."
She wanted to play in the yard. The girl is trying to sit outside and build goddamn sand castles and her "husband" drags her upstairs and rapes her.
Up until 10 years ago, Yemeni law said that children could not marry until 15. In 1998 that law changed, allowing parents to contract their children out into marriage, although their spouse is not allowed to engage them in sexual activity until maturity. For the record, that 10-year-old law was enacted two years before little Nojoud's birth.
The husband is in jail. "Yes I was intimate with her, but I have done nothing wrong, as she is my wife and I have the right and no one can stop me. But if the judge or other people insist that I divorce her, I will do it. It's ok."
Well, thank you, Faez. That's very big of you.
The father, who beat her when she objected to the marriage, was also jailed but released when he suffered health problems. The court does not plan to return her to her family, as there would be nothing to stop them from forcing her to marry again. She will instead be placed in the care of a non-governmental children's organization.
There but for the grace of God go we.
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