I love a story with a happy ending...

Cathy Meyer — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 17:35:13 -0400

What a clever, resourceful woman you are! Hopefully, after all that you are also a satisfied woman.

LMAO! "I leave with a black

Guest — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 12:50:02 -0400

LMAO! "I leave with a black satin bag, a bottle of Slippery Kitty lube and – note how good my friends are to me – a two-cup coffee maker." That's the secret recipe to life, right there! RBYS

So, did the Rabit satisfy?

KarenC — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 12:11:05 -0400

Prior to my divorce my ex had, shall we say, performance problems. So for me, it's been a few years. I didn't miss it while we were still together, but now....

Batteries Not Included

Elaina Goodman — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 11:24:58 -0400

Seven sexless months into my separation from Sam I found that the saying “necessity is the mother of invention” is more than a meaningless cliché.

I’m at my friend Heidi’s and my daughter Lila is shadowing Heidi’s son, George. Lila adores George, who is 3. So George and Lila jump off chairs and laugh, George in his blond hair, Superman boxers, Buzz Light Year shades and nothing else.

Heidi and I are at the table, steam rising from our teacups. Heidi makes a mean cup of green tea. And she used to sell sex toys.

She was a rep with one of those companies that hosts in-house parties, like Tupperware, but with vibrators and nipple nibbler cream, instead of airtight leftover containers.

Somewhere in her house is this box of lonely, untouched sex toys, and I’m a separated single mom and I haven’t sex in seven months. I lean forward. I need that box.

I’ve been asking for months. Where is that box, girl? And, she’s stumped. She knows she put it somewhere... back of a closet, behind her husband’s guitars... but where?

Didn’t she see those capital letters forming over my head when I spoke: WHERE? (By “where” I was saying “urgent.”)

It was almost time to get Roxie on her way, but I was not leaving empty handed.

“You need to find the box,” I say, and now I say “the box” and we both know what I’m talking about. “I’m going to rip your house apart, girl. Seven Months. It’s been seven months,” I say. “Seriously, I’m going to rip the walls out to find that box.”

She says, “Oh my god, I forgot to tell you. I found it!.”

A pause.

“Oh my god. Seven months. I’m so sorry. That’s so long.”

In the back corner of the closet is a pretty pink case with white polka-dots, filled with black satin bags that are stuffed with vibrators.

firstwivesworld - Batteries Not Included - Comments

I love a story with a happy ending...

LMAO! "I leave with a black

So, did the Rabit satisfy?

Batteries Not Included