firstwivesworld - My Ex Is Looking for Sympathy - Comments

Faith, you are such a good

Guest — Sat, 31 May 2008 17:53:11 -0400

Faith, you are such a good person, and everything in your being says that you should be there for him and help him. HOWEVER, there seems to be a theme with his supposed "honest" and "human" ways of reaching out to you... and then he does something or says something truly deplorable and you are right back to square one. I wouldn't trust him any further than I could throw him. This doesn't mean that you aren't open to helping people and being compassionate, but it is not your responsibility to help him feel better about himself. Period. CM

protect yourself!!

Guest — Thu, 29 May 2008 13:07:36 -0400

From what I know of your situation he left you so gently remond him you are not the appropriate person to eb helping him right now - that you are dealing with your own stuff.

My Ex Is Looking for Sympathy

Faith Eggers — Thu, 29 May 2008 12:28:31 -0400

What would you do if your ex called you and revealed all of his personal problems to you? What would you do if the ex in question was an ex like Levi? An ex that not only treated you like crap, but your son as well?

This is the place I suddenly find myself.

In a weird, out-of-the-blue phone call, Levi revealed to me all of his personal problems. And boy, oh boy, does he have a big one. I'm not going to go into all of the details just yet but I will say that he was recently diagnosed with a serious medical issue. Now he wants my sympathy. Now he wants my compassion.

Do you see why I wrote about my father earlier this week?

I'm trying to figure out why I even discussed this with him. Why I didn't just say, "It's not my problem," and hang up on him, as he would surely do to me. I must admit, though, that I was rather pleased with the fact that for once, we were not screaming at each other.

I cannot believe that at this very moment, I am sitting here trying to figure out ways to help him.

And this is how it goes. Every time I feel myself breaking away from him, I find myself being reeled back in.

I think right now, I have to adopt some of Levi's selfishness. I think that I'll be capable of sympathizing with Levi, on some human level; but I don't think it's my job to be his sounding board, or even to help him.

I've never been an "eye for an eye" type of girl, but man, I hope this will open up his eyes.