firstwivesworld - What No One Mentions: The Weight Gain - Comments

Lipo bad idea.

Wanda Woodard — Tue, 27 May 2008 09:45:18 -0400

It has been scientifically proven that Liposuction does not work. You have to return and return again to have this treatment performed, and it hurts and the recovery process sucks.

Interesting about the Liposuction

elainemarleneforbes — Sun, 25 May 2008 00:34:21 -0400

Did you lose the weight first. Your weight gain is about mine. It is not 10 years for me but 6.

Cooking is a Great Idea

elainemarleneforbes — Sun, 25 May 2008 00:29:49 -0400

I think that one can not help eating better if one cooks instead of living on frozen dinners and restuarant food.

It is amazing how everyone has an opinion

elainemarleneforbes — Sun, 25 May 2008 00:28:07 -0400

It is odd that other people feel so free to have views about ones weight. I have a friend who is too thin and people are constantly commenting on it. I think she should probably eat more to be healthy but the issue is not that she looks too thin. I had an idea that we should travel together and not eat anything unless she did as well. We went to a spa and she wanted to skip the lunch we had paid for because we were going to have to check out a few minutes late. It was hard enough to get her to go to lunch and by then I was exhausted and let her just eat vegtables while I ate what I wanted. The food was supposed to be very healthy and I hoped I might lose a pound or so but I didn't, but she did gain three pounds she claims so I guess we won't do that again. The trouble I have discovered about the Fried Green Tomatoes philosophy is that ther is no top weight. I always thought there would be some weight that I would get to and then I would plateau and not gain anymore. But there isn't. But there is truth in the fact that people bugged me a lot about my weight gain when I was say twenty pounds over weight but then stopped bugging me after I got a certain weight, I guess figuring I was a lost cause. I worked on the water this week and tried to cut down on eating in the night but do not know if I was successful but my weight is down two pounds. I have trouble feeling good about getting started on this because there is just so much to do. I have never resolved the financial issues on my separation and I have to do that. I have doctors appointments outstanding. I am behind at work, my house needs work. I am having trouble getting to my studies........ ......getting some popcorn and watching movies seems like a great idea. And worry about rebuilding my life tomorrow.

Pounds after Divorce

Guest — Mon, 19 May 2008 13:40:14 -0400

After my divorce, the refrigerator, especially the freezer section (ice cream) was my only friend. Finding myself as a single parent of two, I went from size 12 to 24 with the chubby cheeks (not on the face), the turkey neck, the flabbly arms, and the belly that didn't let me see my feet, and didn't care, not for at least 10 years. Then I had a wake up call that life was too short (my father died) and knew if I wanted to be around for my kids after high school I'd better start. Today, after having liposuction (www.kjacksonbooks.com) I'm glad to say I'm size 16 and loving it. Ice cream is still my friend, but thankfully not my only friend.

D I E T

Wanda Woodard — Mon, 19 May 2008 09:48:15 -0400

D=dumb I=insanity E=eat T=terrible You're right -- Diet is a four letter word! LOL!

My sister was the same.

Wanda Woodard — Mon, 19 May 2008 09:46:05 -0400

She always lost weight when depressed, and I can tell you that she was very unhealthy during those times, so I know what you're talking about. Either way, we tend to let our personal lives and our emotional states affect our physical beings. I'm starting Kickboxing in the summer, I'm back at my yoga, and I may even start jogging again (ugh!!!!!) But, I may also ...not. My blood pressure is perfect as are my triglycerides and my cholesteral. But, I'm 51, and if I'm going to get it together physically, this is probably a very good time to start.

Dear Justice, I feel your pain.

Wanda Woodard — Mon, 19 May 2008 09:41:29 -0400

I'm what you call a "not gone completely over the edge" yet size eighteen. I am constantly thinking about that comment Kathy Bates made in Fried Green Tomatoes when she told Idgy she just wishes she could go ahead and just get really, really fat and be done with it. Fricking weight!! Drinking water is a very good thing, so that's a good move. The diet cokes? I don't know. I quit drinking them about eight months ago and gained 20 lbs. Go figure. But. And this is a very big but. DO NOT let others determine how you feel about yourself. Your size is just that -- YOURS. Not theirs to comment or even have an opinion about. You obviously have a fabulous mind, and that, and a big heart are what makes a woman a woman -- not our size! Good luck, and know I'm right there with you! Wanda

It really is about being

Guest — Sun, 18 May 2008 20:25:17 -0400

It really is about being healthy for me. I want to live a long and great life, and if I have a pizza and some chocolate, I'm not going to beat myself up, but tomorrow I will make better choices. It's a lifestyle- not a diet. To me the word diet is a four- letter word. CM

i had the same, but opposite, problem

bargee — Sun, 18 May 2008 18:47:00 -0400

wanda, great post! as for me, i lost weight. sounds great, maybe, but i got way, way too skinny--skinnnier than i'd been since before i graduated from high school eons ago. again, maybe this sounds nice if you have struggled with too many pounds, but the bottom line is that i was not healthy. sure, i was getting my full fruit servings for the day if you counted the wine. and my dairy if the cream in my coffee counted. but that's about it. i stopped cooking, started eating at the coffee table if i ate at all. my skin was sallow, my boobs deflated, my clothes looked terrible on me and i sure can't afford a new wardrobe. i loved seeing my hip bones, i'll admit it, but this was no way to live. i've since put a few pounds back on, which is good. symbolically, my fridge just gave out and i had to buy a new one today. when it arrives i'm going to try treat it as a shiny new shrine to healthful eating, to life, to living, to cooking again, to new beginnings. and to ice cream!

The Weight Gain: Tell me about it.

elainemarleneforbes — Sun, 18 May 2008 01:49:32 -0400

Topical for me as I decided to go on a bit of a diet today after stubbornly refusing to do so for years. I have one of those bodies that is very prone to weight gain. I dieted for about 30 years. I was always in the process of losing weight -- or gaining it.. I became a life time member of Weight Watchesrs several times (when I rejoined I was always too embarassed to say I was bigger than the last time I had joined.) Finally I said I was just not going to diet anymore. My weight gradually climbed. When my husband left he cited my weight as being a factor. This made me more stubborn. I was not going to have anyone force me to diet. After the separation the speed of my weight gain accelerated. All I enjoyed was eating and watching t.v. I tried developing new interests and felt that this would stop the weight gain. I knitted non stop for two years. I joined various on line groups and emailed and posted constantly. I became a movie fanatic. Finally I went back to school to take a masters degree part time. This actually increased the weight gain. Studying is not easy when one has been out of school for 30 years. Eating helps. I am sort of proud of my self for keeping it up for two years and completing it is within sight. But the weight gain has continued. I am a lawyer and an idiot judge said on Thursday when I walked up. Look at you you look so >Dicksinian.`` I didn`t even know what it meant. I thought it meant relating to Dickens. However it apparently means to be very aggressive and angry. My droopy and aging face along with my obesity does make me look a bit imposing. Opposing parties have told my clients I look like a Mack truck. How childish can one get, making fun of the apperance of the opposing party``s lawyer. Once in court as we were waiting for the judge to come in to deal with a number of motions and there were too many lawyers to fit at the table, i said I am taking up too much room here... meaning my papers which I intended to gather to let another lawyer. The sisters and new girlfriend of the husband of my client broke into loud dramatic guffaws. I asked the judge to have them leave but he refused. Anyway the fact that this week`s judge felt so completely free to comment on my appearance suggests that this is affecting my work. I find it affected me for the rest of the day and the next in that I had trouble concentrating and felt very defensive. I have decided to try to lose thirty pounds in the remainder of this year. But I still think focusing on weight loss will be bad for me so I propose to focus on just improving my diet first before restricting calories. Who knows maybe I will be lucky enough that just eating better will cause some weight loss. Step one is to make sure I drink eight glasses of water a day. It is supposed to be good for one and if I make a point of drinking that much water, I am thinking I will probably drink less of things that might have calories-- althought I don`t actually drink a lot of calories as I live mainly on diet coke But I think that causes me to retain fluid which of course makes me look bigger. But I must admit I still resent that I have to diet. But hopefully there will be some payback in terms of clothes fitting better, or more energy or positive attention or something that will make it worthwhile. Wish me luck. Or will power or what ever it is going to take.

What No One Mentions: The Weight Gain

Wanda Woodard — Sat, 17 May 2008 12:00:00 -0400

Let's talk about weight, shall we? Yeah, yeah, we're all writing and commenting and visiting this wonderfully supportive site, and we're sharing our thoughts, fears, concerns, hopes and dreams. But what about our bodies?

What wonderful changes can you expect when you move beyond divorce? Hmmm, let's see. Depends, really. Some women who become depressed stop eating altogether. Some eat constantly. Some drink. Some go searching for random acts of sexual contact. I did a bit of drinking the first year, and that coupled with fast food, as I was sad and unwilling to cook (which I think is a happy act) allowed my body to find new mass.

Lovely. Weight gain. My favorite thing. Yours, too, I just bet.

But rather than dwelling on the negative right off the bat, let's start, instead, with the positive. As a 50-year-old woman, a little extra fat in the face makes Botox something completely unnecessary. So, think of it as a free face lift compliments of Ritz crackers, squirt cheese and Tabasco olives, French fries, and sweet tea by the gallons.

A larger bust - maybe depending on your body type. More breast, I don't need. Hell, I paid $12,000 to have them reduced after Joseph was weaned. But, for some, a little extra might be welcome.

OK, that's about it for the positive.

The negative? Ah, where to begin. My skirts hug my waist so tightly that the hug should really be considered a choke hold. My tops "pop" a little if they have buttons in the front. And, for the first time in my life, I have this roll beneath my breasts. And that roll, that roll, is so large it should have an address!

My neck. OK, where exactly did my whole neck go? I mean it's still there if I push my head out away from my body. I can almost succeed in hiding the extra flesh in pictures with this little move.