firstwivesworld - Second Marriage, Second Chance? - Comments

Thanks..

Guest — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 11:48:47 -0500

for the comments! I don't have children and I agree with both of you that choosing the partner the second time around is easier because you know exactly what you DON"T want! Best to you both, Vicky

2nd chances

Guest — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 17:24:16 -0500

When I think about the possibility of re-marrying at some point in the future, if I ever decide to get a divorce from my current husband, I am frightened to death of making the wrong choice again. The stats are awful, and I almost don't want to date or get serious with anyone if the outcome is going to be dismal and painful. I mean, why do it again...it won't hurt any less, at least I don't think. Luckily I don't have children in this marriage so it will make things less complicated, but I only hope that if my life progresses towards another long term commitment, I can truly make the right choice and work at the marriage sooner rather than later.

I've only read the

jilldoughtie — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 16:27:25 -0500

I've only read the statistics on second marriages where kids are involved. In these marraiges, the divorce rate is higher than for first marriages, but only for the first few years of the marriage. If you can get through those first few years, the statistics get much better -- second marriages involving kids are less likely to end in divorce than first marriages from what I understand. This is because it's a huge adjustment period for everyone -- for the kids, for the parents in the other house, and for the married couple. But, from what I've read, people tend to marry partners they're much more compatible with the second time around. Hope that helps put your mind at ease a little bit!

Second Marriage, Second Chance?

Vicky Emerson — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 12:00:39 -0500

Statistics are not in my favor. Second marriages have a higher percentage of failure than first marriages. Not that I am a gambler, but I don't really like my odds.

In two months, I will marry...again. I feel that I am making a very solid decision and that my judgment is sound this time around. However, I'm sure if you would have asked me 10 years ago when I married my first husband, I probably would have told you the same thing.

Why do second marriages fail? This truly perplexes me, because know I never want to go through another divorce. Never. Perhaps some individuals remarry only to find that a second marriage was another bad choice and, since they have already been through the divorce process, it is easier to jump ship. I've had some friends do this and some are even planning their third wedding.

Personally, I feel that my second marriage truly is a second chance, and I am committed to making our marriage work — no matter what.