firstwivesworld - Holidays Bring New Perspective On Family - Comments

Thanks

Taylor Raine — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 12:27:16 -0500

Thanks for your input. We often put blinders on when control is involved by our ex's.... I will try to not allow myself to regret.

It shows considerable growth

Guest — Sun, 06 Jan 2008 19:13:16 -0500

It shows considerable growth to be able to reach out to your ex's family- I think it's wonderful to have them be a part of your children's lives. All will be better because of this. Family is something we should never take for granted. CM

family

Dorotheaa — Sun, 06 Jan 2008 16:21:10 -0500

Don't regret what you can't change..Be proud you figured it out and will not allow anyone to keep you from your family now. And further, you shared this with us so others can rethink if they have done the same in their lives. Spouses, who don't want to inter act with a strong family, are weak and in secure..and strive to control their partners...they are usually worth getting rid of.. Good luck in your new journey..be sure not to make the same mistake twice. My best, Dorothy from grammology remember to call gram http://grammology.com

Holidays Bring New Perspective On Family

Taylor Raine — Sat, 05 Jan 2008 09:00:00 -0500

As much as I enjoy the holidays, I'm really relieved that Christmas is over. I had an enjoyable season with my children and my family. I've grown so much closer to my family, sans husband. He never wanted to entertain at our house, and was never interested in spending any time with my family. So, after a few years of pleading with him, I finally just gave up and we stopped attending many of the family functions around the holidays, just so that I didn't have to listen to him complain.

I now regret making that concession. It wasn't fair to me, or my boys. They had so much fun playing with their cousins and enjoying the love that surrounds a large family. I'm sad that we missed out on previous holidays, but I'm pleased that there are more to come. They're not going anywhere, and they've not shunned us, despite my ex's behavior.

It's so easy to misjudge the value of things in your peripheral vision. Family has always been very important to me, but I was blinded by the fact that I haven't been a very good participant in my extended family. They've been there for me through thick and thin, and I didn't really see that, until now.

My vision has definitely changed. I won't deny my boys any more of their loving family. Now is the time I need to reach out to them, as the throes of 2008 will bring my "epic" divorce trial. I think I will definitely need some hand squeezing!